UCIE - UNESCO Centre for International Education

WHY ARE WE SOMETIMES so reluctant to look at ourselves? Is it because we think we do not have the time? Or that opening ourselves to our own inner world in such a merciless world may make us unnecessarily sensitive, weak even? Or is it that we are not too sure of what we can find inside the Pandora box of our mysterious ‘self’? We have been told so many things …
A symptom commonly experienced when we start looking ‘inside’ and reconnect to ourselves is the emergence of an irresistible feeling of relaxation, inner stability, comfort, peace, warmth and a renewed sense of clarity, strength and freedom – knowing what you have to do and feeling empowered to do it. But we can also come across some not-so-pleasant inner events, things like suppressed – or expressed – anger, insecurity, regret or sorrow.
Sometimes you meet the good feelings; sometimes the bad ones turn up, just like in real life. The difference is that, being more aware of your inner life, you learn to transform the bad guys into good ones. Oh! Can we really do that? The answer is a definite, enthusiastic and resounding ‘yes!’
When you look at it closely, you see that the lack or excess of self-confidence we alternatively experience in our life and all the tension, frustration, cynicism that come with it are bitter fruits bred by a single seed: the belief that we are the image we see in the mirror and that we depend on external evaluation and appraisal for our own sense of identity and self-worth. In simple words: the delusion that possessions or other people’s opinions about us determine whether we are ‘good’ or not. Stressful place to be …
If you have adopted this belief, you probably find yourself open to all kinds of external influences and very vulnerable to manipulation – made to do things that, if you could pause and reflect for a moment, you would never, ever, want to do.
Pause and reflect for a moment.
"The more we depend on what others think and compare ourselves to them, the more we get insecure, tense, dissatisfied and open to be hurt."
Is there another option? Yes, there is.
Deeper inside the heart, below the crust of conditioned behaviour, the inner being knows itself as an inner core of pure goodness, a source of positivity, a treasure of greatness and beauty, a home of peace.
Yet, like all valuable treasures, it is not readily accessible; you cannot buy it; you cannot get it from someone else; and you do not learn it at school. This is probably why so many people just miss it.
To touch the beauty and power of your inner self requires attention: Observe yourself and your life carefully; be awake; trust your own observations, insights and intuitions.
We have been hypnotized to believe that reality is ‘out there’ and that we are empty, inadequate, selfish, competitive and meaningless creatures. But listen to the inner voice and you hear a very different song, one that says that love, wisdom and purpose are an intrinsic part of who you really are.
Have you ever paused for a moment and listened to your own self, to your own heart? Anyone who did knows their own humaneness. By discovering their own originality, they have become aware of the beauty in others; they are qualified to accept their uniqueness, appreciate their difference, trust their talents and truly love.
The inner treasures of character, talents and powers reveal themselves when we are willing to open our heart to the goodness that we are and, from that place, face the world as it is, without projecting our own illusions on reality.
To do that requires the courage to be authentic and sincere with ourselves, but also the patience to cultivate what the Buddha called the ‘mind of love’ – the benevolence that stems from the heart of our being and wins you friends wherever you go.
This attitude is innate. It is the core of what you call ‘I’. And it is the first skill you need if you work in a team and need to adapt, solve problems, create, engage people, lead, educate and … yes, you said it: be happy.
The world today is heading toward a crisis point that is also an awakening point. As things are either falling apart or becoming more controlling and suppressive, we come to a point where it becomes critical to reclaim our freedom to make decisions based on a deeper perception of who we are, of what is true and beneficial for us. Never before has the need for self-reliance and accessing our own resource of intelligence, energy, love and creativity been so vital. This is why self-awareness is now an essential element in the equation of success.
It is easy to just go with the flow and react to smile with smile, to fear with fear and to violence with violence. It is so tempting to live on the surface of life and be shaped by external circumstances like the water does – you touch it and it reacts to adjust its form with a remarkable precision.
It is a wonderful achievement of character to display the plasticity of the water. But this is not enough. We need something deeper. Our consumerist and addictive societies will pass faster than the eternal ‘know thyself’ that is at the heart of the adventure of living.
Yet, most people still miss the connection between the fact that their children, their employees, clients or colleagues do not trust or are not willing to co-operate with them and the fact that they do not cultivate their own inner goodness and live with authenticity, clarity and benevolence.
<Sources: http://selfawarenessforchange.com/you-are-original-and-authentic/>
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